Sunday, August 18, 2013

How Do You Guide Your Child Who Sabotaged His Brother's Scout Efforts?

Remember last week when I posted that Whirlwind was complaining about going on the scout camp out?  And that I mentioned it was an important camp out for both boys? 

Whirlwind sabotaged his brother.  I just don't know if it was intentional or not.

One of the final requirements for Lawboy to receive his Second Class rank was to go on a five mile hike using his compass and map along the way.  The troop got about a mile and a half into the hike when Whirlwind refused to go any further.  Another boy started complaining too and in the end they turned around.  (The troop did not have four leaders so two leaders could return the boys to safety and the other two keep the rest of the troop going).  The troop only hiked three of the five miles. 

When I talked to him about it, Whirlwind kept telling me he'd already passed off that requirement. 

I'm having a hard time discerning whether or not he was really that focused on his own scout goals and not anyone else's, or if it was intentional sabotage of his brother and he's taking a tact he thinks will spare him consequences.  (I don't think he likes the idea of his brother being closer to First Class than he is). 

I think that is one of the hardest parts of being a mom to an ASD kid (at least one of my ASD kids).  There are somethings I know he (Whirlwind) genuinely doesn't get.  Other times (because of things he's shown me he can accomplish) I think I'm getting played.  Usually I can tell the difference, but when we have somewhat unusual or new situations it is harder to figure out. 

I pray a lot for guidance as a mother.  I don't know how I could do it if the Lord didn't grant me inspiration from time to time.  I pray for wisdom and patience.  I know the Lord knows my children even better than I do, and He knows how I can best help them. 

I know the Lord answers my prayers.  On more than one occasion I've relayed a strategy or analogy I was inspired to try with one of my kids--only to have a counselor/therapist/professional tell me I was using a known technique to professionals without my knowing it was an "approved" technique.  I'm not saying this to toot my own horn about my instincts, but to give credit to my Father in Heaven who has helped me do these good things for my children.  By myself I wouldn't know how to do what I do.  With the Lord's help I can do anything.

So now my kids are home and I am lacking Solomon's wisdom.  I am going to be praying about how to handle this situation, because on my own I think I might just screw it up.

Trust in the Lord my friends, Trust in the Lord.

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