Practice Pays Off

I am proud of my boys.  We have a county wide youth orchestra once a year.  Everyone auditions with the same selected pieces and then they are placed in chairs. Firstborn auditioned and for the first time in several years, he is first chair! I am so happy for him.  Whirlwind really doesn't like to practice, but wanted to continue orchestra this year.  We had him audition as well, and though he felt some of the pieces were above his skill level, he  was placed above his expectations.  I am waiting to hear how Lawboy's audition went.  He hasn't really been focussing on preparing his All-County pieces as much as his audition pieces for the same school Firstborn goes to.

Update:  Lawboy got third chair (first violin) for the Middle School Orchestra!  I am so proud of my boys! 

We Have An Eagle Scout!!!

Firstborn passed his Eagle Board of Review tonight!  I am so excited.  This has been such a long road for us.  It was actually his first (and very astute) Cub Scout Den Leader who noticed what a hard time Firstborn had in socializing with the other boys.  She started us on our path of discovery and understanding about autism.  

Firstborn took on a project beyond his skill set (not the least of which was making himself feel comfortable talking to adults about his project--a challenge for any kid--let alone one with Aspergers).  My Dad helped him with gain the skill set to put these chairs together for the park service.


Dear Hubby's parents are visiting, so we all celebrated with a delicious chocolate cake.  Now I just have to plan the Eagle Court of Honor....

Hope you have happy news in your day!

Race and Racing Heart

This last spring my sister challenged me to run a half marathon with her in the fall.  It was 19 weeks away at the time, and I began a couch to half marathon program that left little wiggle room.  I started training and things went well enough at first, but then I had a couple of days when because of the baby waking early (I was still nursing) or something or other the other kids needed in the middle of the night, I wasn't able to get out before the heat of the day kicked in.  I was convinced it was a conspiracy of my family to keep me from running since things only seemed to happen on training days.

My training really fell off the mark, so I settled for the idea that I would run the 10k instead of half.  I kept training as much as I could, but I admittedly lost steam. 

I also ran into an issue when I trained in strong heat and humidity.  My heart would do a weird tap dance and it would cause my breath to be taken away.

I went to my primary care , and she referred me to a cardiologist.  I had several heart tests done and even wore a Holter vest for 24 hours.  Nothing turned up and I proceeded to get ready for my race.  Of course the day after I turned in the monitor was when my heart did its tap dance.

I happened to mention the heart/breath thing to my allergist and he told me he thought it sounded like exercise-induced bronchial spasms.  He prescribed me an inhaler to try ten minutes before my runs to see if it would make a difference.  It seemed to help.

As much as I had done, I was unprepared.  I hadn't trained much with hills, and the course had been changed last minute to a hillier one.  I finished it though.  It was one of the hardest things I've ever done.  I think I pulled something in my legs, since I feel weak even claiming stairs at this point.  My awesome sister who has run half marathons, stayed with me the whole time.  She had a pouch in the back of her shirt where we kept my inhaler.  It was a good thing we kept it.  I had an asthma attack in the middle of the race and needed it.  The hills made it harder than I thought it would, but I finished!  Me the girl who had to pretend she was running for her life to get a decent grade in gym (let me dance for hours instead any day), finished a 10k race!  

Still recovering for the race, but I'm really happy I did it.  A couple of years ago I didn't know if I could run three miles.  Now I've run a six mile race.  My sister wants us to run the Disney Princess Half Marathon in a year or two.  Thankfully I know Orlando, and it's pretty darn flat.  New Goal to look forward to!

Frustrations and Gratitude

We had a 504 meeting for Acroboy.  Well, I thought it was going to be a 504 meeting for Acroboy.

Acroboy's teacher has been giving him some accommodations to help him in class.  He gets extra reminders, visual cues, he sits close to her on the rug and so forth.  His reading skills have blossomed under her care and we have seen him make some progress socially.

He has a dual diagnosis of Autism Spectrum and ADHD, which should qualify him for an IEP.  I've met with the district twice about an IEP for him.  Both times I was told he wasn't behind enough for a perceived academic impact on him.  I also had him evaluated for speech at an early age since he didn't really talk until about his second birthday.  By the time we got the evaluation done he was speaking enough that he didn't qualify for services.  I had worked with him on colors, numbers, shapes, etc. and so there was little for outside resources to do.  He just wasn't far enough behind to warrant services. 

********

This time I wrote a letter stating that though he has dual diagnoses that both qualify him for an IEP, I would settle for a 504 to get the accommodations he is currently receiving written down on paper.  --Firstborn had "unofficial accommodations" and when we met up with a teacher who was less than understanding and willing to work with us, his grades took a nosedive.  I didn't want the same thing to happen to Acroboy. 

The school principal, school counselor, speech therapist, and teacher were all there.  The occupational therapist who examined Acroboy's handwriting was not.  The developmental pediatrician we saw at our favorite Autism medical center also diagnosed Acroboy with Hypotonia (or low muscle tone) in his hands.  Acroboy has terrible handwriting, though the occupational therapist said (via phone call to me at a different time) the handwriting is not out of line with what you would expect in a kindergartner.  

We went over Acroboy's strengths and weaknesses.  His teacher discussed how she had been working with Acroboy on a number of behaviors, social skills and things.  The school speech therapist talked about some of his struggles with social skills as well.  We all know he has had a hard time adjusting to kindergarten.  However, because he has learned to read above grade level and he can figure out times tables now that I have explained the concept to him (4x2 means four groups of two--and he figures out the answer eight), he does not meet their criteria for an educational impact.

They were quick to tell me that he still qualifies for and will receive speech help, but he does not get a 504.

I'm incredibly grateful that Acroboy (and really all of my boys) are doing so well academically.  I have high hopes that they will be able to be fully independent and contributing members of society.  I know many other families who are not so lucky.  Words can't really express how lucky I feel. 

I am frustrated and more than a little concerned that by not writing these accommodations down on paper I will encounter the same problems we did with Firstborn. 

The school officials also told me if we see Acroboy's grades and academic performance go down we can revisit the idea of a 504.  I asked that if I can't get a 504 for Acroboy, when they are placing him in a class next year, could they please place him in a class with a patient and understanding teacher who will work with him--even without the 504.  They assured me they will. 

Meanwhile the occupational therapist sent home a pencil grip and some exercises we can do at home to strengthen Acroboy's hands and improve his handwriting.  

I'm hoping and praying for the best. 

Clone wars (and Pete the Cat)

Yep, I got the title in part from Star Wars.  My kids are Star Wars fans, and so am I.  It seems appropriate though because there are many days I look around my house and I wish that I could clone myself.  Those days it feels like there are so many tasks to get done--they are all "warring" or competing for my attention. 

There are papers to go through, medical expense reports to submit to the flexible spending account, baby clothes to sort and send to consignment or give away, school papers to fill out and/or file, and of course--doctors' appointments to follow up on,  laundry to do, dishes, sweeping, and coats to be hung up. There are plastic bags by the front door need to go back to the grocery store for recycling.

There is mail to take to the post office. Plus I have plenty of projects like creating goal printables I will frame and hang on our wall in the sunroom.  My thought is by creating something nice to look at and framing it, we will give importance to our goals.

There are pants that need to be mended, curtains that need to be hemmed,  I need to finish my menu planning for the next couple of weeks and then go to the grocery store.  And my biggest and most important responsibility is taking care of my children and in particular Baby Girl who is overcoming an ear infection. 

I try to let go of the things that are unimportant, but sometimes when you are in the thick of things, it is hard to keep perspective. 

I am sure I am not alone in feeling this way.

Pete the Cat is a great little book where Pete keeps walking and singing no matter what he encounters, because "It's all good".  

It's days like these where I have to remind myself where my bar really needs to be set.  If the kids are all happy, fed, alive and asleep in their beds at the end of the day, then it is all good.  Everything else that gets done is icing on the cake. 

Trying to Create Some Order In My Life

I'm a pack rat. Income from a long line of pack rats. I have a difficult time letting go of things. Some times it is because of sentimental value, and sometimes it is because I think I might need it someday.

I read recently that scientist may have found a gene that is responsible for my hoarding behavior.

Even if there is a gene, I have the power to choose whether or not I keep things at all. 

At any rate, it means in my 40 some odd years of life I have accumulated a lot of stuff. Some of it is worthless, some of it is waiting to be passed down to the next child. Some of it should get passed on, some should get scrapbooked,and some should be thrown out or given away. 

The problem lies in the time it takes to go through and determine which is which. I'm not the type that can look at a whole box and just say "It's trash."  I have that compulsion to look at each item and assess value.  I've been watching lots of episodes of hoarders and it has made me realize these things about myself and given me motivation to purge and make decisions quickly about items I'm touching.

Additionally, I'm trying to be better at not even bringing things into my home unless I need them. I have put a moratorium on buying any new scrapbook supplies until I use up the ones I have. I'm trying to find a few minutes here and there where I can get through old projects and either get rid of them or finish them.

Getting Ready for Baby

My in-laws will be coming out to visit and help with the baby soon. They plan on being here for a week or so. The bad news is about two weeks after we are due, DH has to go out-of-town on a trip that has been planned for a year.

To prepare myself for that, I've been putting together freezer meals and cleaning and decluttering. My laundry room is cleaner and more organized than it has been in years. I went to the dollar store and got some bins for the shelf to hold various cleaning supplies. I labeled those so we know what is in them. I swept and sort of scrubbed the floor (it's kind of hard being this big).

I also got some smaller containers to hold my spices. I can now pull the basket out, find what I need and put it back. I also grouped my most used spices into one basket and labeled it as well. Now finding what I need is easy.

I've got the baby clothes clean and put away, the portable crib/bassinet set up in my room... I think we are close to being ready. I just have to talk to the doctors about how far over my due date they'll let me go with my history of big babies.

The doctor's visit is tomorrow--wish me luck!

More Goals

I confess, I'm putting off more housework while I write this blog. I at least have the dishwasher running while I write, but I have laundry to do and the piles of papers on my dining table and the stuff to clear away from the basement wall, and a to-do list that has completely filled up the space on my Franklin-Covey compact planner.

I'm taking this time though because one of my goals this year: aside from losing the inches around my waist, arms and legs I mentioned is to write on a more regular basis and improve my writing skills.

I love to write. I really do, and I have an inkling of an idea for a story I'd like to develop, but I know that like muscles, that you need to regularly flex and work, you need to regularly stretch your writing skills as well. So I'm stretching just a bit as I wait for my dishwasher's cycle to be complete.

My goals:
1) Record what I eat on a daily basis (posted yesterday).
2) Exercise at least 4x /week with strength training at least 2-3x. (Didn't clarify that one did I?)
3) Write a couple of paragraphs every day on this blog (at the minimum).
4) Spend 3 hours a week writing on various stories. That works out to be about 1/2 hour per day. (With Sunday off). Try to finish of one of my stories by July 31.

Will post more later. Train boy (C5) is done with his game and needs mommy time.

Wake time:
Breakfast time:
snack
Lunch time:
snack
Dinner:

Exercise:

Moving Forward

So now that I'm letting go, I'm ready to move forward. I've posted goals for myself on my fridge so if I am tempted to go sneaking unhealthy food, they are staring me in the face. One of my goals is to tone up and lose some inches around my waist, arms and legs. (I'm not going to focus on the pounds, but I'm hoping to build more muscle mass which weighs more anyway). I have pictures of myself before C5 was born and I was more tone then. I'm using that as motivation. I do not unrealistically expect to get back to my pre-kid size, (the hips are just too darn wide), but I can expect that I will treat myself well and give myself the best chance possible for a long and healthy life.

My good friend D, who recently completed her Personal Trainer certification has been urging me to write down what I eat and how much. I recently read an article where people who held themselves accountable on their blogs for what they ate, lost a lot of inches and pounds.

So in that spirit I'll be trying to record what I eat and how much and I'm putting it out there for all to see so I hold myself more accountable.

I've got to go to the store now since I've finished off both my baby carrots and my baby spinach. I've got an eggplant I plan on roasting for dinner along with some shrimp. \


Wake up time: 7:00 am
Breakfast time 8:30 am 1 whole egg, 1 egg white 3-4 carrot sticks
snacking on 4-5 carrot sticks throughout the morning.
Lunch: 11:40 am 1 c white rice (I know it should be brown, but I have white cooked and on hand!) 1/2 c chicken sauce 1 big handful of baby spinach.
Dinner:

Exercise: Umm, cleaning the house?

I ran a 5k!

I ran my 5k race!  I hit my goal time which is very good for me.  I didn't run constantly, but did the walk, run, walk, run thing. 

I feel good.  I look forward to running again next year!

Difficult Year Part III

To our great joy, a couple of months after I was called as Relief Society President we found out I was pregnant again.  We were so thrilled beyond imagining.  If you recall from my other post, almost a year prior I had an ectopic pregnancy in which I lost my right tube.  Because of my history with an ectopic pregnancy, the doctors ran labs to ensure my hormone levels were rising appropriately and at 8 weeks I had an ultrasound to make sure the baby was in the right place.  

Everything went great at that first visit.  We saw a good strong heartbeat of our little peanut.  I wasn't all that sick during this pregnancy, but figured that must mean I was having a girl.  I had experienced very little morning sickness with Princess Ballerina.  At my 12 week check-up we were to do the ultrasound study to check the nuchial folds on the baby's neck.  DH was out-of-town again (this time South America), and they asked if a student tech could observe the ultrasound.  The ultrasound tech put the wand on my belly and I could see her frown. She quickly shut off the sound, and I asked again, "There's no heartbeat again, is there?"  

How could my world come crashing down again so quickly?  

*******

This time seemed harder.  Though I have faith in my Father in Heaven's plan for me, I still wondered, "Why?"  The grief physically hurt.  There were moments when all I could do was just breath.  I had only told a couple of people about this baby.  The last time I had announced we would be having a baby, and just days after losing the baby we went to a nursing home we volunteered at, and I was asked, "How is the pregnant mommy?"  

I had to answer, "Not pregnant anymore."

*******

 

Susan, my counselor in the Relief Society was absolutely wonderful.  She took charge of things going on and let me focus on being home with my other children.  I spent a day or two just crying and sleeping and crying some more--grieving my babies whom I would not get to hold.  

I also did a lot of praying and writing in my journal.  Even though I was suffering in my own way, I still felt Heavenly Father and Jesus' love for me.  

It was through turning to Heavenly Father and our Savior that I made it through that sad time.  I had to keep trusting that they have a better plan for me than I had for myself.  When talking to my sister I told her I didn't feel strong enough to handle this.  She told me, "You are strong enough and Heavenly Father knows it.  He blessed you with strength to handle this.  You just need to find it."  She encouraged me to keep turning to the Lord.  

I am grateful for the tender mercies of the Lord that lift and strengthen.  A hymn, a smile from my sweet child, a note from a dear friend--all these things came just when I needed them.  

My faith that I can do hard things when the Lord is on my side increased.  

I also found that in losing myself in service to others I was able to put perspective on things.  I am not the first, nor the last to have gone through miscarriages. I have also been lucky in that I experienced them after I already had five beautiful children.  It took us a while to become pregnant with C1-Firstborn, and I think that had I experienced loss then it would have been even harder because I wouldn't have known if I would ever be a mother.  

Serving others who have less, who are sick or who are struggling with family situations harder than mine reminded me just how much I do have.  

If you are feeling down or heavy with your own burdens, find someone else you can help.  I promise you it will help you put things into perspective and give you a good feeling to know you've helped someone else.  

It's been a couple of months since our last tragedy and I've been keeping busy with activities for my other children and serving the members of our church congregation.  My parents visited with us briefly and that helped too.   Right after their visit we took a family vacation--something we haven't done in three years.  We badly needed it.  Finally, I've set a goal to run a 5k in the fall.  I run with two other women in the morning and they are a huge boost to me.  

I am grateful for each day that I have with my loved ones.  Each day is a gift and though it is sometimes hard to remember that, I do know it is true.  

Go hug some more people, okay?